Let’s get one thing clear right from the start.
You will read this and ask yourself, ‘Who DOES that?‘ Maybe even, ‘What an idiot!,‘ but I stand by the very words I shared with our 350,000 listeners on the radio:
It’s my husband’s fault.
Not really, but the more I say it the more I believe it. It takes the edge off a bit. Kind of like when we tell ourselves we really do look good in that bikini. Sort of an illusion and eventually the line that divides reality from cuckoo begins to blur.
In our favor.
As you can see in the photo, we had a small emergency at our home this week. Not a 9-1-1 send-an-ambulance emergency, but enough that my husband didn’t speak to me for 2 hours. I’ve tried to explain what happened to several people, and I get the same result every time. Glazed eyes staring me at me almost with a look of constipation. So, I’m skipping the boring details and giving you the bullet points:
Grab my purse to go pick up my son at friend’s home.
Hit garage door button on wall and head to car.
Hear garage door moving, start engine, hear door stop.
Put car in reverse.
Nearly wet myself when I hear loud crash.
Realize garage door was not open.
Observe damage and try to think of fabricated story to tell my husband, who is sitting inside on the couch.
Consider blaming the accident on my two innocent boys.
Greeted by alarmed husband in garage who questions the loud noise.
Husband says nothing and does an about-face.
Quickly learn that silent treatment SUCKS.
*and there you have it*
That really happened. I’m still in total disbelief, yet I was THERE, present and accounted for. I know what you’re thinking, so now would be the time to re-read those bullet points. Did you see that I hit the button?
I repeat: I. Hit. The. Dang. Button.
Here’s where the blame comes in. Hubby had returned home an hour earlier, and left the garage door OPEN.
So in essence, I CLOSED the stupid door.
Then turned into Roadrunner and tried to back out of it. I certainly enjoyed the comment of ‘Sucks to be blonde‘ on the Jim, Deb & Kevin facebook page. (Thank you to the rest of the encouraging posters.) I think a more fair statement would be…
‘Sucks to be Blonde and Have a Husband Who Left the Garage Door Open, Resulting in it’s Eventual Closing.’
I know, I’m reaching. My co-host calls me a blamer. But that’s my story. I screwed up and I’m blaming the hubby. Seems reasonable to me. Who WOULDN’T? He let me know this morning as the repairman installed a brand NEW garage door that the damage will cost us $750.00.
Sorry kids, we’ll be skipping that spring break trip this year. Look on the bright side…it provided Mom with a blog post topic. Isn’t that great? And people will laugh at your mom? Isn’t that what you want?
Update: Husband sent a text this morning to say he loves me. Followed by an apology for being a grouch about the incident. And I’ve forgiven him *wink wink* for leaving the door OPEN to begin with. Isn’t he lucky to have married someone who doesn’t hold nearly $800 grudges?
He doesn’t realize it yet, but he will.
In the meantime, thanks (sarcasm) to my husband’s co-workers who posted advertisements for a driving school and a garage door company on his desk when he arrived to work.
Not helping ease the blow here, folks.
He’s not convinced, though I told him one day we’ll look back on this and laugh. Because we ALL make mistakes. I just make really big ones.
Ever done something so stupid? Please share. I’m in dire need of any material to help plead my case.