Him: Hey Mom, this 2nd-grade girl at school was totally checking me out today.

Me: Oh yeah? How do you know?

Him: Mom. Really? She was doing this _______. (Insert a 6-year-old’s imitation of a girl making googly eyes.)

Me: I see.

Him: It was on the playground. So, I hung upside down on the monkey bars for another minute just so she could get a longer look.

Me: Smart move.

Him: Lookin’ good for the ladies!

Me: (Trying to contain my laughter) Hayden, I don’t know where you get it.

Him: (As he runs off) I’m tellin’ you, Mom. I am sooooooo gettin’ a girlfriend.

Clearly, I’m in trouble.