That’s what Amy Grant’s daughter calls the things that a seamstress wanted Amy to wear in her evening gown. To, ahem, enhance her attributes. Amy told me, Jim, and Kevin that those “things” look like chicken cutlets.

She asked if I’d ever heard of them. HEARD of them?

I own a pair.

Thinking about those “cutlets” reminds me. Two weeks from now, it is Zoobilation, the big summer event in Indianapolis.

Last year, Greg and I were there. I had my enhancers on.

I grabbed a friend and headed for the dance floor. We shimmied to the music, and you can imagine my surprise when I realized something had, well, moved. My little secret was now…

…on the floor by my feet.

For everyone to see.

How do you discreetly scoop up something that looks like chicken and shove them in a purse? I had to laugh, but I learned my lesson.

Leave ’em at home. Amy Grant agrees.